I haven't written anything in a long time. I feel like writing for the next hour about everything, but at the same time, I don't. Well, in all honesty, I could use some sense of catharsis, so I'm gonna try something.
First thing. Southern California. Los Angeles/Orange County. This trip made me realize one thing. I NEED to live in California before I die. My life will be incomplete if I don't. Even though the weather was not amazing while I was there, if thats the worst it gets, who gives a shit? The scenery was gorgeous. The city is eclectic. The beaches are huge. All the places we visited: Huntington Beach (Surf City), Newport Beach, Laguna Beach, Dana Point, Venice Beach (WEIRD-ASS PLACE), Los Angeles (Hollywood [SHADY-ASS PLACE], Beverly Hills, Burbank[the real Hollywood]), Malibu, Santa Monica, Disneyland........its strange seeing all these places without the filter of reality TV...you know? Well, anyway....life story time YAY:
I have always been drawn to California. I think a lot of people are. The sun, the sand, Hollywood, etc etc. People put Southern California in this ideological/ not entirely realistic place in their minds. And I used to always say "I want to live in California", "I'm going to move there" etc etc. But, all it takes is ONE RAISED EYEBROW to sow the seeds of doubt. Assholes. So then I was like "I'm gonna move to New York City", "I want to live in New York City" for a while, because California had somehow become this unreachable place. Then college started, and then I was saying that "I'm gonna live in a city in the northeast. Boston, NYC, Pittsburgh....idk, I'm just gonna stay east." THEN, more recently, I started thinking about what kind of job I was gonna have, what companies I was interested in. I remember looking at the list of companies that frequently comes to penn state to recruit, and just not being interested in a single one. Which kind of alarmed me. Because I was a marketing major that wasn't interested in doing a single one of these jobs at these companies. They just sounded boring and tedious and uninspired. So I don't know how it happened, I think through a few conversations with one of my friends who's a Disney freaking fanatic (tangent - people think I like Disney too much....this girl lemme tell you....well actually our love of Disney is seperate.... I couldnt tell you much about Disney World, but she could tell you anything and everything about Walt Disney World and the parks and hotels....she goes there once a year with her family and now works at two hotels on Disney property....my knowledge of Disney spans movies, music, TV, and stuff), I was searching jobs at Disney's website and looked up the marketing jobs. As I was reading job titles and clicking on descriptions, I got a funny feeling. I got excited, which was probably the first time I ever felt like that concerning marketing. I think I might have even written a blog about this, but I found of new sense of purpose and inspiration with entertainment/media marketing. Not retail, not consumer goods, not pharmaceuticals, not research, not anything else.
90% of the jobs listed were in Los Angeles. Which didn't sink in until maybe 5 months ago. Like shit. If I want to do this, I HAVE to move across the country. Thats kind of a big fucking deal for me. Because talking about moving to California is one thing...actually having to consider doing it is like whoah.. wait a minute. Hold the phone. Its FAR. Its EXPENSIVE. Traffic SUCKS (it really does). EARTHQUAKES (holy shit that earthquake hit LA 6 days after I left. If that had happened while I was there lord have mercy). Los Angeles is far from perfect and not even in an endearing "I love its imperfections!" way (that sounded cynical). The entertainment industry is FAR far from glamorous, but its the only industry I see myself working in (right now at least). These thoughts sent me back into a "What the fuck am I gonna do?" state of mind.
(I love how melodramatic my narration sounds. Its cathartic! I like that word! Moving on.)
I took the trip to LA as a kind of test drive. Could I see myself living here. Do I want to live here? The result was a resounding YES. YES YES YES.
I was thinking about it, and is there anything holding me in PA? I always knew I would move and never permanently stay in Berks County. Its not like I talk to a lot of my high school friends anymore, and the sad (or not) thing is is that I don't care that much. My best friend lives in Florida. My extended family lives in upstate NY. There's about 3ish people that I'm really connected to in Berks. They all have lives and dreams of their own too, that go beyond Berks, as do my friends at college. My parents have ALWAYS, always intended to sell our house in PA and retire in NY and PR, so they wont even be around to visit. There is nothing holding me here.
So, I have a plan. Which sounds innocent, but I've avoided telling anyone, because all it takes is ONE. FUCKING. RAISED. EYEBROW. I'm in a fragile state of mind right now (whole different animal of a topic) and anything could completely unravel me at any moment. But that is a whole different topic that I will NOT get into. But anyways, yes, a plan. That I hope I can stick to. That would be nice. That would be great, actually.
They say everything happens for a reason, and I REALLY hope that holds true.
So I realized I havent even mentioned one thing about what I did in California. Well, we went on a tour of the Warner Brothers studios, which was REALLY cool. We went to the Griffith Observatory, which I LOVED because I recently saw Rebel Without a Cause and I was teenie-ing when I recognized filming locations around the building. Plus the view of LA and the Hollywood sign was pretty neat. We drove through the Sunset Strip and saw all the famous clubs that you arent sure why they're famous, just know that they are. Except everyone knows why the Viper Room is famous. And Chateau Marmont is always mentioned in tabloids. Umm Rodeo Drive was expensive. Santa Monica was really pretty. Venice Beach was weird and smelled like pot. I am not exaggerating. There was a medical marijuana clinic thing every 40 yards. Orange County was neat. As we were driving into Newport, California by Phantom Planet came on the radio. It was rad. We drove by my dad's old house and middle school and where him and his brothers and sisters used to go to the beach. It was cool. DISNEYLAND WAS AWESOME. But they didnt have fireworks. Only fail of the week. So much more but I'm tired of writing. Byyeeeee. :)